Being a carer for children with Special Educational Needs while studying law

It is estimated that there are 5.8 million unpaid carers in the UK providing care and support to their family, friends or neighbour. I am part of those statistics, as I care full-time for my children who have special needs. 

In this blog I share my experience of being a carer while studying for an OU Law degree.

A particularly familiar sight for carers like me is the mountains of paperwork that come with their children's Educational Health and Care Plans (EHCPs). From the applications, appeals for refusals to assess, refusal to issue, and appeals for contents and placements. With each of these come more assessments, countless phone calls and emails with local authorities, solicitors, schools and medical and other professionals. This can feel like a full-time job as a carer taking on new challenges and stepping up to the roles they are required for. This continues until they finally achieve what they set out to obtain, their child's plan in place, now hopefully supported and settled in school or education. 

Many parents are left exhausted by this long process and the constant advocacy, whilst also meeting their child’s care needs, but some, including myself, found that through all the struggles, they gained valuable experience and insight into the process and chose to put that to good use. 

A surprising trend I noticed in conversations between parents of children with special educational needs, was that they found inspiration and motivation to return to their studies or train for a new career path in areas such as psychology and law. Some did this because they wanted to educate themselves more on the subject for personal development, to understand further and to help their children. Others wanted to help change the special needs education system at a local level for children, their families and schools.  Some chose to campaign for the government to make changes to the application and assessment process of the system in relation to special education. 

Being a carer can mean sacrifices to careers, finances, and social opportunities, which can make it harder to access work or education. Many find that their current career does not work around their families needs anymore, or they have developed an interest in learning more about special needs, education, and the areas around these. 

After spending the past 7 or so years in continuous SEND (Special Educational Needs and Disabilities) appeals, representing myself at tribunals, and being successful, I decided to put my experience and new gained knowledge into something practical. I have helped other parents and carers with my knowledge of the SEN system and supported them with advice for their applications and annual reviews of the EHCPs. 

People always suggested I should do this as a profession, but I liked to just help others, because I knew how hard the process could be and how long it could take, and this was my lived experience. I had not realised how much knowledge I had gained in the process of advocating for my children, and helping other parents and schools. 

These skills and this knowledge translated into the skills that could help me with my learning and understanding. For example, I had first-hand experience of how a first tier tribunal service worked. This included the application process, the people involved and the hearing and outcome. I learnt new terminology and understood how decisions were made and the court process, which helped give me a better understanding when it came to learning about how the courts work in my module. 

When I was younger, I studied art and fashion at college and university, so I have always been very into creative and art-based subjects. I enjoy reading, learning languages, and have been learning Latin for years in my spare time. I also like to garden and find this a great way to connect to nature and relax or spend time with my family. A lot of my time is still dedicated to caring. 

However, I found that this year was the perfect opportunity to finally sign up for an Open University course. However, there was a decision over which course to choose. What would work around my family now and when looking at career choices. I found myself drawn to the option of a Law Degree. Maybe I could put my experience and interests into a course that I not only found exciting, but one I would have the skills for. 

I took the free course on Myths in Law and knew instantly law was the course for me. I am currently in my first year as a law student and am so glad I took the leap to finally start with The Open University this year. I have been able to fit the study around my caring needs and give both the attention and time they need. 

This year I also joined other parents at my son's special needs school in setting up a charity to help fundraiser for the school and build a community, and I am enjoying my new role as secretary and running our social media campaigns. 

When balancing study, caring and my other commitments, I make sure to: 

• Fit in a lot of my studies while my children are at school, or in the evenings and Saturday mornings
• Organise my diary and plan key dates and deadlines
• Read in blocks, or have books or downloaded chapters when on the go
• Have an organised desk, notebooks, and I use my laptop and phone apps too
• Take time to rest and recharge as well

Although the course is online, I have been able to interact and speak to other students in the online tutorials and forums and hear their thoughts and views. 

I do not feel like I am just learning from home on my own and I have found it inspiring to see so many different backgrounds, including other carers or parents of children with Special Educational Needs on the law module too. 

Hayley Tilbey

I am a mum and full-time carer to my children. I am a student in my first year of my law degree with The Open University, which I am really enjoying.

In my spare time, I am a trustee for the charity at my son’s special needs school. I get to work with other parents, carers, local businesses, and other charities to support our school community and provide resources for the children at the school.